Have you ever sat down, reflected on your life and felt gratitude for all the horrible things that life has thrown at you?

Prior to this week, my answer would have been an unequivocal no, with a facial expression that suggested you are slightly mad for asking. I had never felt gratitude for the struggles I have gone through in my brief 28 years. However, when I was listening to a podcast last Thursday a switch in my brain suddenly flipped.

During the podcast, the host mentioned a woman who attended one of his recent comedy shows. The woman mentioned that just days before the show she had been diagnosed with breast cancer. Upon hearing this, the host assumed this woman would be feeling a number of different emotions: denial, fear, anger, depression. But not gratitude.

So naturally, it came as a surprise to everyone when she said that in spite of feeling of these other expected emotions that come with something as devastating and life changing as a cancer diagnosis, she was grateful for having this challenge laid out in front of her. Then it hit me.

“Holy $#*%! I actually have a lot to be grateful for related to my past trauma”

I know you might think it sounds ridiculous, but bear with me as I break it all down. Here are the reasons why I am grateful for my trauma history.

1. I can see situations from different perspectives

Prior to some of my past experiences it was hard for me to understand how certain things can occur, or why people behave in certain ways in different situations. With my life experiences, I can now see how someone can find themselves in a dangerous situation, how a person can respond to violence as it is happening to them, and the aftermath of that.

My ability to see things from different perspectives also feeds into the next thing I am grateful for.

2. I am able to have compassion for people who are too often looked down on

Through what I have experienced and witnessed, I have compassion for those in society that others may not. We are all a collection of our cumulative life experiences.

3. I now know that I am stronger than the sum of my parts

You never know how resilient you are until that resilience is tested. And by God, has my resilience been tested.
Despite all the odds, not only am I functioning but I am achieving things that I never thought I could.

Would I go through all the trauma again to gain these insights? Probably not. Nor would I recommend it as a way to gain insight. However, it feels good to know I came out the other side with something greater than what was thrown at me. And that feeling is truly something to be grateful for.

Goodbye for now, and remember – keep calm, and grow strong